1. Corgis are in 62% of all photos of real-life animals posing with stuffed animal versions of themselves.
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2. Corgis are influential stretchers.
3. Corgis are major influencers in the Halloween industry.
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4. They’re also the ones who actually invented the popular internet meme called “breading.”
5. Have I mentioned all of the lives they have saved this year? Hundreds.
6. They’re responsible for one-twelfth of this year’s American lobster trade.
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7. Corgis are great at policing. Unlike human officers, corgis stay rational. They also wear bow ties.
8. Corgis are poised to make their biggest impact at next year’s Olympic games. A record three corgis are going to compete in downhill skiing.
9. For you breeders, corgis are advocates for playground safety.
10. They’re master impressionists.
11. And will also drive you home when you’ve had too much to drink.
12. Politically, corgis have made great in progress in inter-dog communication.
13. They’ve basically brought great peace to the dog world.
14. They can rap.
15. They will literally sit in your mailbox and fetch your mail.
16. They’re also just cool. I know that’s shallow, but hey, it’s a fact.
17. Have a bunch of balloons? No problem! Corgis are great at guarding them.
18. And they defy all laws of gravity.
19. And some corgis, not all, are great personal shoppers. A growing industry in Corgi Nation.
20. Also, can you imagine a world without CORGI PUPPIES?
21. A world without corgi puppies is like a world without oxygen.
22. I CAN’T EVEN BREATHE AT THE THOUGHT.
23. We would all basically die.
24. Humankind would cease to exist.
25. We would all go to hell and live in a constant, never-ending nightmare.
26. Because THERE WOULD BE NO CORGI PUPPIES IN HELL.
27. In conclusion, SAVE THE CORGIS.
28. DO IT FOR THE CHILDREN (OR JUST FOR YOURSELF IF YOU’RE SELFISH LIKE ME).
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